Three Hearings, Three Play Lists

During the decade-long saga of Catherine Lynne Carter’s fearful fixation on me, I made three CD “playlists” of songs that brought me comfort as I remembered, meditated and prepared for the unpleasant hearings and legal stupidity she had chosen. The first mix was a farewell mix made after her 1999 suit against me, to capture and honor some of the emotional roller-coaster that was our “romantic period”, from the time we first slept together until she unilaterally decided that I wanted to kill her. The second mix was a meditation mix, made after the 2006 hearing to help me think about and consider various things that might be at play within her clearly disturbed mind, so that I might find more compassion and understanding around the irrational things that she had done. The third mix was made just before our third hearing date in 2009, a pre-fight mix to help steel me for the unpleasant task ahead. The first mix was sequential, representing various phases in our romantic relationship and ending with a hopeful Goddess song about her longing for her dead mother, Lynne. The others were designed for “random play” and are listed alphabetically by song title.

1999 Mix on Romantic Journey

Each of these songs refers to a specific incident within the relationship, with the final two being one each for where I was and where I hoped she would find comfort.

  1. Love Theme from Romeo & Juliet (Henry Mancini Singers)
  2. Obsession (Sara McLachlin)
  3. Crash (Dave Matthews Band)
  4. Standing Outside a Broken Phone Booth with Money in My Hand (Primitive Radio Gods)
  5. Barely Breathing    (Duncan Sheik)
  6. Long December    (Counting Crows)
  7. Counting Blue Cars (Smashmouth)
  8. Arms of the Angels (Sara McLachlin)
  9. Dar Williams – February (Dar Williams)
  10. River (Joni Mitchell)
  11. Sympathetic Character (Alanis Morissette)
  12. I Miss You (Randy Williams)
  13. Hymn to Her (The Pretenders)

2006 Mix on What Might Be in Her Head

This mix I made entirely of Alanis Morrissette songs and entitled “Temporary Arrangements.” Morrissette is a brilliant singer-songwriter from a country known to produce brilliant singer-songwriters, and her deep insights across multiple perspectives on the human condition has always served to deepen my understanding, make me more compassionate and enrich my life.

2009 Mix to Prepare a Clean End with Mercy

This was a “pre-fight mix” such as boxers or cage fighters use to prepare for battle which, in this case, meant to steel me against the willingness to try and protect someone who wanted to damage me, as I had in 2006. This mix was prepared the day before our hearing, and was what I meditated on the night before.

This was a random-play mix, with titles listed alphabetically.

Posted August 20th, 2009 in 1. Round One, 2. Round Two, 3. Round Three.

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